Because my life isn’t going to wait around while I figure out how to make it work. – Susane Colasanti
In life, there are moments where we often find ourselves stuck or filled with self-doubt and uncertainty. We become our own worst enemy, telling ourselves we can’t do this or we’re not good enough to do that. All of a sudden we are afraid to pursue our passions and dreams. Why is that? The number one reason people are afraid to jump out and take a chance is fear. Fear of disappointing ourselves, our families, significant others, etc. Franklin Roosevelt once said,
The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
When we are afraid, we tend to hold ourselves back. When we feel uncertain about something, we freeze up; it’s a natural response. The problem is getting past it and moving forward.
The first thing to do is take a deep breath and relax. We have to realize that change is inevitable. You can either face it head on and embrace it, or you can turn tail and run. I speak from experience. I used to be terrified of change and afraid to step outside my comfort zone. The problem with having a comfort zone is that after a while, it becomes uncomfortable and small. With that discomfort comes the feeling of wanting something more. Yet the fear is still there. It’s okay to be afraid. Fear is a natural response to change. What’s not okay is letting that fear control your life and keep you from living it to the fullest.
You also need to have faith and trust yourself. Realize that you were created for a reason. Even if you don’t know what that reason or purpose is, know that you are here to do something with your life. My favorite quote from the TV show Monk is
leap and a net will appear
You have to trust that by stepping outside of your comfort zone and trusting yourself, your net will appear to catch you.
It takes time to learn how to stop holding yourself back. Sometimes you can figure it out on your own, and sometimes it might take a professional to help you sort through everything to get to the core reason why you can’t move forward. The most important thing is to not pressure yourself. Don’t feel as though everyone else is moving forward and you are still standing in the same place you were before.
I still have my moments of self doubt and question decisions that I’ve made. I look at the outcome of those decisions. I realized that I am better off than where I was before and I’m happy with where I am and what I’ve accomplished so far. By not allowing my fear to come between me and my dreams.
For those of you who are experiencing this, start small. Join a club or organization. Start talking to one new person each day. Keep a journal of your accomplishments each day as you work toward your goals and dreams. If you need professional help in moving forward, don’t be afraid to seek it out! In the long run you’ll end up much happier.